Life is slowly shaping up. I’m finally settled in my own apartment; I just finished furnishing it myself. I’m doing well in college too, passing all my tests and making good impressions. I’m taking some time off from sexual solicitation until I’m ready to get back into it.
Ryan always manages to surprise me and I absolutely love his sense of wit. He just knows how to cheer me up whenever I’m feeling down. I can’t imagine anyone being around him and not liking him. I was also recently introduced to his best friend Lee who’s great too; she’s practically the female version of him which is obvious, since they get a long very well. She’s low-maintenance and usually just goes with the flow. Tye on the other hand, I haven’t warmed up to yet. There’s no doubt that he’s a nice guy with good intentions, but sometimes he’s just too much. He didn’t seem too friendly to me the last few times we hung out, and after doing my own investigation, I’ve found out he knew about my secret life. I asked Ryan if he told him anything, and he admitted that he did.
“Tye kept asking me all these questions about you, and honestly, I think he knew. I’ve told him you quit doing it, so it’s fine,” he said.
We went roller skating the other day, and after we were done, we hung out in the food court and had hot dogs. As we ate, I remembered I had a photography assignment that I had to turn in the following week; the teacher wanted nude male and female portraits. I reluctantly asked Ryan and Lee if they’d be down to volunteer and they didn’t hesitate to say no. When I looked at Tye, he had a dissatisfying look on his face. I take photography very seriously, and so I didn’t understand why he took it the wrong way. It’s like ever since he found out I was prostituting myself, his perception of me shifted, and so he no longer sees me the same way he did before. He’s also concealed and boring, sometimes even offensive. The only reason I’m still putting up with him is because of Ryan. Although their relationships seems to be built to last, I can’t help but wonder whether they’re truly in love or just find each other safe to be with. Tye is very dominant and assertive, and acts almost like a parent rather than a boyfriend. I hope he’d make it easier for me to blend it instead of judging me for what I did. Then again, Ryan did warn me about his old-fashioned and conservative nature.
I feel like something must’ve happened to Ryan in the past, when he himself was a sex worker. He clearly doesn’t want to talk about it, though, and I’m not going to make him share his experience with me if he doesn’t want to.
Felix Eberstark 